What would happen if we started being honest with ourselves about what we really want?

What if we started being ruthlessly real? What if we actually said the things that we think about, but are afraid to say?

Our egos may shrink and squirm, afraid to face reality as it is; afraid to bypass all the pretense; afraid to confront the shear nakedness of authenticity.

But maybe if we could evade the grip of our ego-based fears, we could embrace unfiltered, unmediated reality.

Maybe, just then, we’d start to come alive.

When I speak of open, authentic honesty, I mean being truly connected to your higher self. Not the ego-dominated self, but your spirit, (or whatever word you’d like to use, the word is not important). When you’re tuned into this source that is bigger than your puny ego, your living from a state of unadulterated awareness.

When you’re acting from this state, you’re not thinking about whether what you’re doing is right or wrong, appropriate or inappropriate. You act completely naturally, unafraid to express yourself authentically and freely. You’re not afraid to tell someone how you really feel or ask for something you need. It’s from this place that you experience bliss, because there is no ego holding you back from it. There is no hesitation when the ego is not present.

So how do you get into this state of flow and uninhibited movement?

Here are the three simplest and most effective things you can to become more conscious, and in turn, more authentic.

• Practice mindfulness. This is the most important aspect of acting authentically. If you’re not being mindful, you lose awareness of your ability to determine whether you are acting reactively or if you are acting from your authentic Self. I have to admit, remaining in a position of persistent mindfulness is not an easy task. This is not something you will master in a day, a month or even a year. But you can practice, and the more you practice the more it will be easy to remain mindful. The way to practice mindfulness is to simply center your focus and attention on whatever you are presently doing or experiencing. Easy to describe, difficult to practice.
• Use reminders to help you stay mindful. There are a lot of mental triggers (or anchors, in NLP terms) you can create to prompt you to return to mindfulness. One great trigger is remembering to be mindful every time you see a red light at a stop light; or just every time you come to a stoplight, green, yellow or red. I have a bell on my bike that I ring when I’m riding to help remind me to be mindful. Another good and more permanent reminder is getting a tattoo somewhere you can easily see to make you mindful. If that’s not your thing, you could have a bracelet or ring that you’ve chosen as a sacred symbol to help remind you to be mindful.
• Practice daily meditation. There is no substitute for consistent, daily meditation in aiding your facility to remain present. The best thing about meditation is it also allows you time to actually listen to yourself. Most of the time, we’re constantly talking to ourselves and we never take the time to listen. During the practice of silent awareness, we have the opportunity to listen to our thoughts and feelings, and in doing so, we’ll be better equipped to remain mindful when we feel pulled into unconscious patterns. The most important thing to do is start small. Practice meditating for 5 or 10 minutes each day before you go to sleep or after you wake up. Don’t be hard on yourself if you feel your mind isn’t quieting fast enough, or if you think you’re not good at meditating. If you remain diligent, your mind will eventually get tired of listening to itself babble incessantly.

The more mindful we become, the more we increase our capacity for action that is stripped of pretense and duplicity.

When we’re completely authentic, we’re no longer afraid to speak and act in meaningful ways. We’re not afraid to tell someone how we truly feel. We don’t shirk when faced with the choice of either acting from integrity or slipping into cowardly ego-based decisions.

Maybe if we started saying the things we think but do not say, our lives would have more meaning.

Special thanks to guest contributor Jonathan Mead of Zen Habits for this article. It’s always been one of my favorite ones that I read and re-read often.

ShareTweetBuffer

Related posts:

1. Savor the Little Things

Time to shop for the men and boys in our lives. Here’s my top deal picks for Christmas gifts for those special guys! {Most would also make great gifts for women and girls too!}.

I never pay shipping, I get my ordered goods in 2 days and I do NOT pay for an Amazon Prime plan to get that 2 day shipping! (Read this previous post about how to make that happen).

Read my post yesterday about my rave over the Kindle Fire!

Tomorrow I’ll be sharing my top picks for gifts and deals for toddlers!

I’m giving a little head start with the PictureMe Books offer by York Photo. I use York Photo for many of my 4×6 prints and they never let me down. They have this 2 for 1 special on right now which would make the ultimate Christmas gift for Grandma and Grandpa!

ShareTweetBuffer

Related posts:

1. Christmas on the Beach Photographic Art

Today kicks off my annual ten days of Christmas deals and I’m starting with gift ideas for women. As many of you know, I buy everything from cereal, diapers and apparel to electronics, books and nutritional supplements on Amazon. Just ask my UPS driver, he’ll tell you all about how he comes to my house more than anybody else!

I never pay shipping, I get my ordered goods in 2 days and I do NOT pay for an Amazon Prime plan to get that 2 day shipping! (Read this previous post about how to make that happen).

You can’t go wrong with a little inspirational gift and these top the charts! Everyone loves quotes. I tweet hundreds of quotes and these are some of the ones that get retweeted and commented on most. They’d be well received in a pretty Christmas gift bag with some color coordinated tissue (simple as that!).

Note: They are currently on sale and some are selling out quick. These ones were in stock at time of writing this:

ShareTweetBuffer

Related posts:

1. Day Thirteen: 31 Days of Props
2. A Great Gift for a Teacher or Mentor

• Exclusively for Amazon Mom members, receive an additional 15% discount on top of the base 5% discount on diapers and wipes when you sign up for Subscribe & Save delivery. Subscribe & Save orders are always delivered with free standard shipping, and you can change your delivery schedule or cancel at any time.
• Three months of FREE Two-Day shipping with Amazon Prime. For every $25 you spend within a single order in the Baby Store, we’ll grant you an additional month of Amazon Prime shipping benefits. When you’re signed in, eligible items will have a yellow stripe at the top of the detail page that says “Amazon Mom: Purchase this and other Baby items to extend your Amazon Prime FREE Shipping Benefits.” A maximum of one year of Prime benefits can be earned this way from the date you joined Amazon Mom.

It doesn’t cost anything to participate in Amazon Mom. Nada. Not a cent.

There’s also the opportunity to upgrade and get additional perks. Or, if you’re not eligible for Amazon Mom, it still pays to purchase an Amazon Prime membership. There are many perks in addition to the free 2-day shipping. A few of them are:

• Upgrades to One-Day Shipping for $3.99/item.
• Additional discounts off many products with Subscribe & Save Delivery and other exclusive discounts and offers.
• Unlimited, instant streaming of thousands of movies and TV shows with Prime instant videos.
• Thousands of books to borrow for free, as frequently as once a month, with no due dates through the Kindle Owners’ Lending Library.

Get your Amazon Prime membership now and get 2-day shipping from now on. Say good-bye to shipping fees altogether!

ShareTweetBuffer

No related posts.

If you haven’t signed up for these daily deals both nationally and in your area, click below, sign up and add your school, too! There’s info at the bottom of the main page.

Related posts:

1. Project Beach Daily: Deep in Thought
2. Project Beach Daily Now @ Kokabella

Today was my third anniversary. My husband’s en route home and I was feeling a little bluesy that we weren’t together today. Nothing that a little bling, bling can’t cure! After all, we can always change the date and go out on a little date after he gets back!

Today at Posh, I found this amazing, gorgeous, crazy cool brushed silver necklace. My eyes nearly popped out of my head and I almost tripped over myself getting to it! My husband knows that I drool over silver jewelry so it was only appropriate that I bite the bullet and get this one as an anniversary gift! (At least that’s what I’d convinced myself of!).

Ohhh… thank you babe! You couldn’t have picked a more loved gift!

The same jewelry dealer at Posh had this necklace and earring set there. The prices are seriously outrageous (in an awesome way!) so guess what else is new in my jewelry collection?! Stunning!

All in all, I came home with the two jewelry sets and two pairs of adorable shoes for less than what I can easily spend on skinny vanilla lattes in less than a month! I loooove Posh! It’s my favorite high end women’s consignment boutique. My closet is starting to look fabulous again and I can still afford my skinny vanilla lattes thanks to Posh of Fleming Island!

ShareTweetBuffer

Related posts:

1. “Posh” Photographic Art

Ohhhh… MEEEOW! My new chair arrived today. I just got it put together (I am such a handy kinda girl!) and I am loving it… looooving it! Some of the prints out there are so tacky or the fabric is el cheapo. I was pleasantly surprised when I opened the box to find this precious gem! It’s gorgeous and makes a terrific addition and accent piece for my relaxation room. I love to sit here at night and read. Peace and love is oozing from the room, especially now!

ShareTweetBuffer

Related posts:

1. Day Fourteen: 31 Days of Props

I love how my scrabble board turned out. Vintage cool, huh?!

I’m sitting in bed playing Words with Friends on my iPhone and yes, it’s 4 am… uh huh, pathetic. I hear ya! My husband’s away and well, what else is a girl to do at 4 am but sharpen up her language skills?! (Get your mind out of there!).

This game is addictive. It’s like Scrabble and you can play against friends… or strangers! Hey, keep your thoughts to yourself. Yes, I play with strangers! :-)

Go ahead, hit me up and challenge me. I’m Kokabella on Words with Friends.

ShareTweetBuffer

Related posts:

1. Business Start-Up Ideas: Words that Sell

The artist, Drayok, charges $27 for basic keys, $34 for medium keys and $47 for detailed ones. The work that must go into them alone makes them worth every pretty penny. Check out Drayok’s gallery.

ShareTweetBuffer

Related posts:

1. Woman of Worth

At 13 months of age, my daughter has a knack for art! Give a girl some paint and paper and watch Picasso smile down from the heavens! How sweet is this?! ;-) It’s so gorgeous, I think I will have it printed on canvas! Ohhh, my little Sophia! (I’m not too proud!).

ShareTweetBuffer

Related posts:

1. Child’s Play: You Are An Artist {Inspiring Video}
2. My Little Piece of “Precious”